Surrender.....

Change happens.  There is just no escaping it, and when the change comes from loss I prefer to pull on a stiff upper lip and jive about cycles and new beginnings, clouds with silver linings - blah, blah, blah!!!  Then despite all that BS something deep inside me still clings to the past.  Its often not even the real past, just the rosy colored version of it.  I'm going into full disclosure here because I know we all tend to have the exact same "unique" experiences so I realize I'm not alone.  

This week presented me with the loss of two great men who impacted my life in profound ways and participated in creating the foundation of who I am, and how I move through this world.  They had both lived 90 years with some amazing and some completely average adventures.  They lived with joy and love, and even their deaths happened full of grace and beauty so when my clingy selfishness showed up monday morning I realized that they gave me one last gift.  By dying at almost the same time they took my ability to obsess and wallow in sadness away.  There was no way to focus on one person and the sadness I feel is so overwhelming that I am only left with the option to let them go.  To surrender.

My deepest love and thanks to my great teachers Sri K. Pattabhi Jois and my Uncle Jack Shine.  Because of you I will always have a yoga practice, and I will always plant fruit trees.  

Don't worry G'ma Barb & Abuela Irma I promise to continue to cling.